Darryl standing in a field with a crow perched on his arm
Hi, I'm
Darryl
and I will
Train A Crow
For You

I will train your crow to do pretty much whatever you want. If it's physically possible and doesn't hurt the bird, I can make it happen. That's just what I do.

$53/hr • Honest Rate
See What Your Crow Can Do →

Look, it's pretty simple.

Crows are one of the smartest animals on the planet. They can recognize faces, solve puzzles, use tools, and hold grudges for years. Most people don't know what to do with that. I do.

I'm Darryl. I grew up in Appalachia where the crows outnumbered the people, and I've been working with them since I was twelve years old. Now I live in Ohio, and I train crows for regular folks who want a bird that actually does something useful.

There's two rules: it has to be physically possible, and we don't hurt the bird. Other than that, sky's the limit. Literally. These things fly.

Darryl in his element, working with crows

What Can Your Crow Do?

Here's a sampling of what I've trained crows to do. This ain't a complete list — if you got an idea, just tell me and I'll let you know if the bird can handle it.

Crow cawing at a car parked in front of a driveway
a.k.a. "The Lawman"

Parking Enforcement

Your crow learns to recognize the person who keeps parking in front of your driveway. Then it caws at them — persistently, loudly, and with great conviction — until they stop doing it. Problem solved.

Crow carrying a shiny coin in its beak
a.k.a. "C.R.E.A.M."

Loose Change Retrieval

Cash Rules Everything Around Me. Your crow spots loose change around your property, picks it up, and delivers it to your doorstep. It's not gonna make you rich, but it'll pay for itself over time.

Crow perched on a mailbox alerting about a delivery truck
a.k.a. "The Delivery Scout"

Delivery Alert System

If you spend time outside — gardening, grilling, whatever — your crow gives a specific alert call when a delivery truck like UPS or Amazon enters the street. No more missed packages.

Crow carrying a small folded note in its beak, flying over a backyard fence
a.k.a. "The Postman"

Short-Range Note Delivery

Your crow learns to carry a small folded note from your house to a specific nearby location — a neighbor's porch, your kid's treehouse, the end of your driveway. Faster and more reliable than your nephew.

Crow picking up a bottle cap and trading it for a treat
a.k.a. "The Bartertown"

Neighborhood Cleanup

Your crow picks up cigarette butts and plastic bottle caps and brings them to you. Only as a fair trade, of course — they get delicious treats in exchange. It's commerce. The crow understands this.

Crow perched alertly at a window watching someone approach
a.k.a. "The Maitre'D"

Biological Doorbell

Your crow flies to a specific window or perch the moment someone walks up your front path. Like a Ring doorbell, except it runs on peanuts instead of Wi-Fi and never needs a firmware update.

Crow swooping toward a squirrel raiding a bird feeder
a.k.a. "The Bouncer"

Garden & Feeder Defense

Squirrels, raccoons, pigeons — anything you designate as an unwelcome guest gets dive-bombed and cawed at until it leaves. Crows are naturally territorial, so this is less "training" and more "giving the crow a job it already wanted."

Crow hiding a small key in a hollow tree trunk
a.k.a. "The Keymaster"

Emergency Spare Key

Your crow hides a spare key in a spot only a bird can reach. When you need it, give the signal and it retrieves the key. Locked out? Your crow's got you.

Fashionable crow wearing a tiny top hat
a.k.a. "The Haberdashery"

Themed Hats

Crows love wearing hats. Cowboy hat, top hat, bowler hat, backwards baseball cap — you pick the style. Match it to your crow's primary role for maximum effect.

Crow cawing from a porch railing at dawn
a.k.a. "The Town Crier"

Morning Alarm Crow

Your crow caws at your bedroom window at a specific time every morning. Unlike your phone alarm, you can't hit snooze on a crow. It doesn't care about your feelings. It's here to do a job.

Full Service Details →

All services: $53/hour

Flat rate. No surprises. The crow and I both appreciate directness.

All crow training is conducted within the obvious limits of physics and animal safety. Crows are living creatures and are treated with respect and care at all times. Darryl does not train crows to do anything that would cause harm to the bird, any person, or anyone's property. Results may vary depending on the individual crow's temperament and your willingness to keep up with treat inventory.